2019 Advent Challenge

'Two days until Christmas Day, Rex,' I said, pausing to hang a streamer of red tinsel on a roadside birch tree. Night was falling, bringing a wave of peaceful darkness over Sovereign City. This place was nice, but would we stay for much longer? Already I was itching to discover what lay beyond the country of Vallis where I'd been trapped my whole life.

Rex walked beside me, hands shoved deep in his coat pockets for warmth. He looked content – which was rare for him. 'Yeah,' he said pensively.

'Looking forwards to a Christmas without Sargon?' I asked.

'Without Sargon and without anything else,' he replied. 'I think this is going to be my first festive season that I'll actually enjoy.'

I fell silent, recalling all the times Rex had told me about his childhood. It brought back dusty, half-forgotten memories of sitting in dark apartments together, listening to the foxes barking outside, with no-one to depend upon except ourselves, and nothing to look forward to except a lifetime of killing others. Dark days indeed.

'It'll be fun,' I said at last. 'You don't have to worry about anything anymore. You can finally relax and enjoy the party, knowing that Sargon isn't sitting across the room from you.'

'Yeah,' said Rex again. 'Sometimes it's still hard to believe that we don't need to worry about those things anymore. I keep expecting something horrible to happen.'

'We're safe here.'

'You can't know that for sure. What if something does happen?'

'What are you expecting?' I let a faintly teasing note creep into my voice, just to annoy him. 'Ana to rise up from the grave and crash the party? Actually, she doesn't have a grave. Well, point proven.'

He huffed out a quiet sigh. 'I know that nothing's really going to happen, but I can't stop thinking about it. Whenever it seems like life is going well, my mind throws all kinds of doubts at me.' He tapped the side of his head for emphasis. 'It makes it very hard to relax.'

I slung an arm around his shoulders as we walked along. 'You just need some time,' I said. 'You've spent literally every Christmas of your life expecting bad things to happen. Of course your mind's having a hard time believing that this year's going to be any different. But just wait. If this Christmas goes well – and it will – then you'll find it easier to relax and enjoy yourself next year.'

'I suppose so,' said Rex. His gaze drifted curiously up and down the street before settling on an undecorated tree. 'Have you still got any of those decorations on you?' he asked, slowing his pace to get a better look.

I accepted the change of subject without question; I knew that he didn't like talking about his personal problems for too long. 'I might have some baubles,' I said, digging in my coat pockets and finding two of them, plus a sparkling star decoration that I hadn't realised was in there. I tossed one of the baubles to Rex, who caught it effortlessly.

The tree wasn't very pretty. Stripped of all its summer leaves, it had several branches missing – cut off so they wouldn't hang across the road – and resembled a pile of dead twigs. I wasn't surprised that nobody had decided to decorate it.

Rex eyed the tree for a moment, then shifted into raven form and flew up to hang the bauble on one of the higher branches. I hung mine on a lower branch, then called out to Rex.

'Put this at the top somewhere!'

I threw the silver star up at him and watched him snatch it out of the air with his beak. Shifting back to human form and balancing carefully on a thin branch, he attached the star to the highest spot he could reach, before hastily jumping back down to the ground.

'I don't like heights,' he complained.

'Well, it looks good,' I said, tilting my head back to observe the tree. Although it was still pretty sparse, I thought it looked less... lonely now that it had a few decorations to call its own. 'Come on, let's hurry up and get to the bar. It's freezing out here.'

We started walking again, admiring the colourful lights strung up between the buildings. As night fell and the temperatures dropped, I decided to mimic Rex and stuff my hands into my coat pockets.

'You're getting me a Christmas present, right?' I said a few minutes later.

Rex scoffed. 'Why wouldn't I? Though I have to admit it was very hard to think of anything. You've already got everything you want.'

'That's true. Except for an awesome sports car, a sword that's not falling apart, and a cellar full of alcohol.'

'Well, I can't get you a car of any sort, but maybe I can help you with one of the other things. And what about you? Are you getting me a present?'

'Of course. Nobody else will, so I'm obligated to,' I said with a quick smirk.

He didn't grace that with a response, instead focusing his attention on the brightly-lit shape of the royal palace in the distance. Although we weren't heading there, I almost wanted to. It looked so strangely inviting. Maybe that's just because the post-war party was held there, I mused.

We finally arrived at the bar Rex had wanted to visit. Before we could step through the door, he tugged on my sleeve to grab my attention. 'Isn't there supposed to be a party at the palace on Christmas Day?' he asked.

'Huh, I forgot about that... yes, there will be. Are you going?'

I could see Rex chewing indecisively on his tongue. 'I think so,' he said. 'I'm not sure how I feel about being around so many other people, most of which are complete strangers... it's just not something I'm used to. The last big party I attended was one of Ana's Christmas parties, and I don't exactly have fond memories of those times. But I want to be able to enjoy this one.'

I nodded lightly in understanding. 'Like I said earlier, it'll get easier with time. You have a lot of bad memories associated with Christmas, but eventually, you'll start to form new – and better – ones.'

'I'll believe that when it happens.'

'It will. Hopefully. Hell, if it were up to me, I'd make sure you never had to suffer another bad Christmas again. But I can't exactly guarantee that, so... I'll just do the best I can to help you. Like I always have.'

Rex's gaze went distant, and he hesitated for a few seconds before pulling me into a rough hug.

'Thanks,' he said quietly. 'I don't thank you often enough for all the times you've helped me, so I'm saying it now. You're a good friend.'

I didn't want to take my hands out of my pockets to hug him back, but I let myself relax against him to show I reciprocated. 'You've done a lot for me, too,' I said. 'Don't make it sound like you haven't.'

He let go and turned to push the door open. As we stepped into the warmth and gentle noise, he said, 'Don't worry; I don't think as badly of myself as I used to. I know that you appreciate my existence, even if I don't always understand why.' A crooked smile curled up one side of his mouth. 'Can we just get some drinks and talk about something more lighthearted for a while?'

Although I knew that Rex might never entirely get over his problems, he had looked contented tonight. It was comforting to see him so at ease with his surroundings, aware that he no longer needed to worry about Sargon or any of the other monsters from his past.

'Yeah, let's do that,' I agreed, and we started looking for a place to sit down. Christmas music hummed out of the stereo in the corner, and for the first time in decades, I felt like I could enjoy it again.