Tears for Years

1290 words (excluding headlines)

A new way to start off the year wrong

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Flying overhead the festive after parties littering the landscape of Roseacre, a pouflon that beheld wings of much majesty sought some new people to chase down. He had already done his duties of tracking down clans of bandits, a task that any bandit would hope someone else took other than this tumultuous animal. With nothing to do job wise, this big pouf had to make up his own games to take dread out of his head. This big guy was bored to no end, and now for the start of new year, much havoc would rain on the nobles of Roseacre thanks to this boredom.

As if his dull days couldn't get any worse, he was now stuck with a job he didn't remember agreeing to. Jake had gulped down so much root beer at the Knight Club Tavern that some joker swindled him into agreeing to take on this job! It was so dark in that cave, as dark as the night he was soaring through earlier, and this cavern was anything but pleasant. The dripping of water against a rocky floor was the only music that entertained this pouflon guarding what was possibly a dangerous criminal. The guard had asked this potential danger a million times how to get the heck up out of that cave, but it seemed this guy was one of those newbie prisoners that didn't break out whenever they felt like it.

Instead, this guard had to sit through quite the story this "Prince" guy was hacking out at him, and to all this, Jake responded, "Eh? What's all this you're saying?"

Casually lounging in front of the door, Jake was trying to take in this narrative this "Prince" guy just threw at him. "Man, I haven't heard kingdom conspiracies like this since I accidentally locked myself up with a vespire that had some biting issue or something. Couldn't tell the difference between rocks and my armor I tossed at him, boy. I don't know how he was talking through those chains around his snout but anyway..." Jake rambled on, but he never realized he was talking at a volume the prisoner couldn't hear.

Tearing up your vegetables

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After a good few moments of silence, Jake shouted, "HEY! You mind if I call you Tearing?" Terrible coughing erupted out of the prison door, and Jake didn't feel need wait for Prince Terryn to respond. "Nah, pouflon, you don't mind. You need some food, Tearing? I know I do, this isn't the way I planned my tenth dinner of the New Year, you know?"

"I assure you... I'm in much more need than just food.... I've made it clear enough I needed water desperately....... and yet you've given me only an empty ladle," Prince Terryn wheezed. "At the very least... could you find it in your heart to listen to what this kingdom needs?" The prince let out a nasty cough. "It shouldn't meet hardships it needn't go through!"

"Tearing, you're telling me you really can't reach water from there?! How are you supposed to learn how to eat your veggies at this rate?"

"... P-pardon me?"

With a heavy sigh, Jake looked up at the bars on the door and said, "You sure do know how to speak, a good mouthful at that, but until you prove to me you know how to get your own darn water and get to eating your veggies, I'm not letting you out of your pin." Scratching his goatee a bit, Jake turned his attention to some pretty crystals that were asking for some good chomping. "Kids these day, sheesh..."

That prisoner stood there for a good ten minutes, possibly trying to figure out what this guard was going on about. Perhaps the weightiness from chugging all that root beer that night was making Jake send this poor prisoner into a whole lot of confusion. A little more time passed before sounds of hooves and chains beating against the floors of the cell started filling the air. A tune from the bars began replacing the melody of chains, and this music would not stop until it was met with a growl.

"Hey. What are you doing?" the guard grunted, and he looked up to see this prisoner was using that spoon to dare annoy him. "Aaaagh, alright." Jake lifted himself off the floor to meet the wary star pupils of the prisoner. "Let's make a deal. You get me some food, and I'll let you go out to play, okay? But only for an hour, then you have to promise me that you'll be right back."

"They lock up the wrong kind of people in here!"

---

The prisoner went dead silent again-- honestly anyone would probably do the same and ask, "what was going on with this guard?" Seemingly desperate however, Prince Terryn responded, "... what food is it that you want from a prisoner like me?"

"Get me some rubies with a side of tomato sandwich. Don't put the rubies in the sandwich, I had enough ruby tomato sandwich at camp to ever want it again."

"How, from where I stand.... do you expect me to retrieve you rubies?"

"AAGH! You know what, I'm tired of playing pretend. Listen kid, if you're going to pretend you're a prince, at least try to be convincing!! You can't be a prince any more than you can get me some food from there." Hacking and coughing arising out that cell irritated this guard more, inspiring Jake to snarl, "Lying rascal, think I'm gullible or something..."

"Please... please reconsider... what you think of me... let me show you that I'm telling the truth!"

Jake kicked the door with his hind feet and let out a deep bark that made that prisoner hush his mouth. If Jake tried hard enough, maybe all his sugar-rushed anger could've broken this "prince" out of that cell with hooves alone. Enraged screeching echoed through the halls of the prison. Jake let out another shout, but all his furious screaming didn't inspire anyone to walk down the stairs to free him from this shift!

"I hate work like this, I HATE lazy folk that make you do all their work for them! This stanking job! Lowdown dirt-munching pouflons don't want to do no WORK, it's no wonder there's so many knuckleheads choosing to be bandits these days!" Jake ranted. "Just them low-lives wait, Imma lock ALL of them up in this place! They need to throw some USELESS KNIGHTS up in here!!"

A puzzling escape at last?

---

After roaring out a sigh, Jake calmed down from feeling cheated. He turn his head to get a good look at the pouflon behind the steel bars. "I don't know what this world has come to throwing kids in jail that want to play 'kingdom'," the guard muttered to himself. "By the way, I'd suggest not talking about the queen that way, you might grow up being wanted for treason or something. I tell you, it'll be worse than what they're treating you like now."

It was then the bored jailer noticed the odd locking system upon the giant door. "Ugh, finally, they give me some games to play down here! This the worst job I've ever taken, but this puzzle here might make up for it." Squinting at the mysterious glowing writing, Jake grasped the bars with his teeth and started gnawing at them. When the guard realized those bars weren't chocolate bars that could be melted with his bites, he grunted, "Hey Tearing, I got a fun activity we can play. Give me some help with this puzzle, will you?"

Whatever was going on with that collar, it wasn't leaving that prisoner in the best of appearances. Nevertheless, the shackled prisoner struggled his way to be closer to the door again to tell this hungry guard what to do.